Quotes...

Hey guys. Wow! it's been one of those months. I have so much to share with you. However, schools not quite over yet, so I'm stressed for time right now cuz I have to study for finals (spanish and Math), but I'll definately try to tell ya'll about all that's been going on this weeked before we leave for our California trip. But...TOMORROW'S OUR LAST DAY! We have our final finals...he he...tomorrow. It's our third half day and I'm so excited. I'm going to miss all my friends, but I'm not going to miss the homework. Besides, this way I have more time to spend with family and church family. It's weird almost being a junior. I dread all the work I'll have next year, but I've got to go through it sometime. Anyway, I was going through a book full of christian quotes and couldn't help but start to write some of them down. As you can see I got a little carried away, but they're all good and I hope you enjoy them...despite the length. (They get a little more thought provoking as you read through them.) =D
Oh, and I'd encourage you to really think through some of these and not just blow them off, because, some more than others, really have a point.

· Need an extreme makeover? Get a faith lift!
· Fight truth decay…read the Bible.
· Don’t let worries get you down…Even Moses started out as a Basket Case!
· Caution: Non-exposure to the Son will cause burning!
· Come on in, we’re prayer conditioned.
· Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
· You can’t use the wages of sin to buy your way into heaven.
· God can fix anything…(and he doesn’t use any duct tape!)
· Church parking only…trespassers will be baptized.
· Today is a gift from God. That’s why they call it “The Present.”
· God promises a smooth landing, not a smooth flight.
· Working for the Lord may be hard, but the “retirement perks” are out of this world!
· Write your plans in pencil…and give God the eraser.
· Life is like hide and seek. You’re either seeking, or hiding, from God.
· Many want to serve God, but only as an advisor.
· Don’t give the devil a ride; he’ll always want to drive.
· Don’t give God instructions, just report for duty.
· Don’t put a question mark where God puts a period.
· God always answers knee mail.
· Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
· No God, No peace…Know God, Know Peace.
· Sitting in church makes you a Christian, like sitting in your garage makes you a car!
· Plan ahead…it wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark.
· Be ye fishers of men. You catch them…God cleans them.
· The Best vitamin for a Christian is B-1.
· Exercise daily…walk with the Lord.
· Remember…a day hemmed in prayer is less likely to unravel.
· If God is your co pilot…switch seats.
· When you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep…talk to the Shepherd.
· The task ahead of us is never greater than the power behind us.

God...

Well, I've had a God week that's for sure. For starters I went to tri-state, we won, and I got to go to the last half of the retreat wich was a huge blessing. I have so many God stories...but very little time. I have homework and it's almost time for bed, but I'll try to fill ya'll in as soon as possible.
In the mean time...
here's a question that was randomly asked by an Aimer in my service project group at Workshop that left an impression on me, because it really made me think.

What's your favorite thing about God? why?

On my mind

I have much on my heart and therefore, for the most part, much I'd like to share. A lot has happened in the past two weeks. Unfortunately I have very little time, right now anyway. So, for now, I'll stick to the things that are at the forefront of my mind. Before that though, I'd like to point out that at the very bottom of my blog I have a daily bible verse that changes...yes you guessed it...daily. I'd encourage you to scroll down and read it each time you have the chance to get on my blog...or get your own...because I've found it really uplifting, insightful, and encouraging.

So, here it goes...

You know how little stuff can just pile up until it becomes one big heavy burden? that's how it's come about (little things such as school in general right now...) and that's how I feel...weighed down/frustrated/confused. I'll stick to the iceing on the cake. The iceing on the cake was the game Saturday night. Sure it was a close and frustrating game, but that's not it. It's the fact that I didn't play at all. It wouldn't be such a big deal, but we've been training hard all week for State (even through pouring rain) and I've seen myself improve quite a bit just this week...and to not even get to play a little bit? I can't help but ask myself, "Is my best not good enough... or am I just not trying hard enough?" On top of that Randy came to watch me play and well, he didn't get to see me play. It was embarassing after the game, people coming up to me not knowing what to say...saying good job anyway... Sunday morning being recognized as a state champion along with Catie when I didn't do anything to contribute to the game at all...those reminders.

I've been having a hard time deciding if I wanted to go to tri-state this weekend or to the advance. I was leaning towards going to tri-state, but, Now, more than ever, I really don't know. cuz I mean really... would I get to play? I hate saying all this stuff cuz it's negative thinking, but i'd be lying if I tried to say anything else. I feel like such a failure...useless...alone...

Also, everything I've just said is a parallel to my spiritual life currently. I feel disconnected...useless. I know it's the devils doing, finigling his way into my thoughts, but they're there nonetheless. I find myself stifling my true passion and emotions. God puts things on my heart during discussions at church, and at school, but more often than not something holds me back. Plus, all that I gained from the totally dependent experiment...I've begun to slowly lose my grip on. My life has started to become sectioned again into school and church, but I don't want it to be. My heart cries out. I want to be one with the spirit, with my abba father. I want my entire life to be about and for him, but it's so hard. Often I find that I long for the very things that I want to berid of and I'm often afraid of the things that I long to posses and be apart of... My heart and spirit, my whole being cries out to the lamb.

Thanks for listening...

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. " ~Romans 7: 15-20~

~Please keep me in your prayers.~

Totally Dependent

Hey guys. I don't know if ya'll had the chance to read our totally dependent blog or not, but all of the following blogs are my written thoughts. I thought you might like to read, if you hadn't yet, some of the things God did and had on my heart during the totally dependent experiment. You may still want go to our blog even though the experiment is over and read some of the other hearts that were poured out. (The link is at the bottom.)
I love all of you and am excited to be part of this God filled blogging community.
~In Him~

God week...

Well, first of all it has been a God week that's for sure. I don't know how to describe it. There haven't been any spiritual fireworks, and I wasn't expecting them, but there has definately been an undescribable peace that has been with me. It's amazing what a few constant prayers can do.

I have noticed myself being more focused on my Father throughout my day which has begun to lead to an attitude change for the most part. God has really opened my eyes this week and allowed me to see what he can do with my life if I just let him.

I got to thinking and my life is really like a road trip. I guarantee you that if we just give God the wheel he'd gladly take it for us. My problem is that sometimes I get where I don't like the direction that God is driving and so i try to grab the wheel and make a u turn, because I'm scared. I don't doubt what God can do, but i doubt myself. I'm a vessel God's driving/using and that's an awesome thought, but at the same time it can be intimidating; if I give God the wheel who knows where I'll go. Some places may challenge me and be very uncomfortable, but that's the beauty about God, He knows just what we need and when we need them and we've got to go through those tight places in order to grow. And that's where totally depending on Him really comes in. I've got to let him be the driver of my life.

God thank you so much for the opportunity to do this with my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. Continue to be with us as we learn to become totally dependent on you.

I Peter 4:6-7"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you..."

God is good!

Wow...where do i start? God is so good. I've already seen and experienced Him working many times through all this and we've only been doing this for two weeks! I'm so excited and can't wait to see what else God will do during the next five weeks...and even further down the road.

Well, for starters, my week didn't start out so great. I had this huge research paper due Friday and I was going to get a large portion of it done monday, because we had school off. The next thing you know my day is pretty much gone and I've done none of my paper. I look back at my day and realize that I made no efforts to totally depend on my God and let him take care of my day. Instead, I had filled my day with distractions like the computer and T.V..By the time I had reached the end of my day I was a complete wreck. I had already begun to stress about my paper and I had the whole week ahead of me.

Before you know it I find myself in my mothers arms at the feet of our Father. Together, we did what I should have been doing all day. (It's amazing how God uses other people to help us refocus.) We gave it to God...told him that I couldn't do this alone, without Him. It was out of my control...that was obvious...and it was all him.

Looking back on that week It was definately apparent that God was working. Wouldn't you know that my paper came together smoothly even after the rough start, and I had remotely no stress the rest of the week? In fact, this was the first paper, if I remember correctly, that I have written with relatively no stress, rather I had this unexplainable peace that was with me. Also, through out all this somehow I had an overall positive attitude/perspective. The only explanation is God. I give him the glory. Isn't our God amazing?

Father, I thank you so much for being with me through this, however small it may be, and giving me a glimpse of you, your awesome power, and your love. I ask that you continue to walk with me and guide me as I strive to become more dependant on you.

Philippians 2:13"...for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose."

Depending on God

Where do I start? I have so much weighing on my heart and so many thoughts running through my head that I'm not sure exactly how to sort through the muddled mess and actually put it to words. I will have to rely on the Spirit...My God to take care of that for me? (ironic isn't it?)

I guess that's really where it all starts. Relying on God to dig through all my mess, make sense of it, and turn it into something glorious...a feat only our God can accomplish. And even further into the heart of it...relying on God to help me rely on Him. This idea is something I've noticed over and over again, especially this week. I cannot depend on my God without his constant help, for apart from Him I can do nothing.

In all honesty though, I find myself, not necessarily trying to but none-the-less, living either without searching for that depending help from God or living without depending on Him at all. It's so hard and, especially for me, can be really discouraging/ disheartening. All too often I discover that I have hindered myself from depending on Him. My selfish desires, impatience, and pride get in the way and in reality cut off that connection. Many times, even after pleading with God to remind me that I need that dependent connection with him, I'll get distracted and forget throughout the course of my day.

So I find myself absentmindedly attempting to handle the normal 'small' things. Like several people I've talked to, I have no problem giving God the big things, because I know without a doubt that I can't handle those on my own. However, the smaller things...I can easily deceive myself into thinking that somehow I can handle those . No biggie right? psh...ya right. Apart from God I can do nothing! And the thing that throws me is why that's even appealing to me. I mean it should be obvious that every time I try to meddle in something that I know won't do any good, especially things like this that the Lord himself can take care of, that the opposite of good usually happens. Anything has the potential to be good...especially where God is concerned...but If I try it myself, it can potentially come out all wrong. And then I can become more discouraged than before; deeper in my problems/ struggles...and what good does that do? Nothing! Absolutely nothing. So, after analyzing all this...the root of the matter is obvious. I need my God.

Abba, I ask that you'll constantly remind me how much I need you and the nothingness that I am without you. I need you to help me rely on you to help me depend on you. Father I need you, more than I've ever needed anything...I need you and I plead for your constant help and presence to be with me wherever I am. Give me the strength and patience to set aside myself so you can truly come in and do what only you can do...For apart from you, I can do nothing.

James 4:7-8 "Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you."